Are Divorce Rates on The Rise Primarily the Fault of Women?
By
Kaniz Fatma, New Age Islam
22 September
2023
The
Stubbornness of Women Is One of The Reasons Why Marriages Collapse
Main
Points
1. Globally,
divorce rates are rising, especially in the Muslim world, leading to
discussions among parliamentary and social organizations on causes and
solutions.
2. Women,
as family backbones and teachers, prepare children for a better society.
3. We
urge women to regain femininity and tenderness, while Pharaonic husbands should
use their manhood wisely and forbearingly, resisting the temptation to act like
Pharaohs.
-----
Why
is divorce becoming a more prevalent trend globally? Everyone is curious about
the causes of the rising divorce rate, which is a trend that is particularly
significant in the Muslim world. Many of our parliamentary and social
organisations are now debating its causes and solutions because it has become
such a hot topic.
Whatever
actions have been made to slow the rising divorce rate thus far have not been
entirely successful. Therefore, it is necessary to offer a clear solution so
that women who pay attention to it can be spared from the greater difficulties
and sorrows that follow divorce. Although divorce is a notion that exists in
Islam, it has also been highly denounced because it not only causes the
separation of a husband and wife but also worsens the challenges faced by
divorced women and jeopardises the futures of their children.
In
a marriage, both happiness and despair are inescapable environments.
Psychologically, a person cannot possibly be happy or unhappy all the time. It
is inevitable that humanity will change in attitude and situation.
There
are many times between a husband and wife when the husband has an opinion and
the wife doesn't share it or like it. This is an extremely delicate position.
When there is a conflict, it is sometimes important for a man to act patiently,
and it is sometimes required for a woman to act gently and patiently. When a
woman prioritizes her opinion while exhibiting intensity and stubbornness
rather than gentleness, the outcome is highly serious and its harmful
ramifications start to manifest. The woman forgets that if she persists in
arguing her case and insists on disliking her husband's viewpoint, a hostile
environment would be created between the two, which could eventually result in
divorce. In addition to their separation, the outcome will be negative for the
children's future. Both men and women are in some way accountable for the
rising divorce rate, but in this essay, we will focus especially on the
accountability of women and their obstinacy.
The
Stubbornness of Women Is One of The Reasons Why Marriages Collapse
If
we are talking about women, they are the backbone of the family and the
teachers in this life. As a result, if you raise a girl correctly, she will
grow into a good wife and mother who will raise a good generation, and what she
teaches them will have a significant influence on building a better society. On
the other hand, if a woman is untrained, lacks moral and emotional insight into
the situation, and is stubborn and does not listen to anyone before her, keep
in mind that her stubbornness can be easily ignored at her parents' house, but
it can cause trouble for her in her in-laws' home. We have observed a lot of
obstinate women who very easily cause the dissolution of marriages and other
relationships, including those with their parental family. A woman who lacks
patience and fortitude and instead has superiority and stubbornness will cause
marriage to fail because she will use push-pull techniques to succeed and will
put her selfishness and stubbornness above other family members.
The
qualities of a lady who is easy-going, kind, loving, devoted, and receptive are
extolled in numerous Islamic traditions and Ahadith. The Messenger of Allah,
peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, and the Companions who came after him
set a good example for us. They advised women to control their husbands with
intelligence, gentleness, and obedience in order to win their affection.
When
a wise and intelligent woman constructs a permanent home, she exhibits such
tenderness and fortitude that the storm of the greatest challenges passes in
front of her, the days of trouble are over, and she begins to live in days of
prosperity. A stubborn woman, on the other hand, is like a dry stick that
breaks and shatters on its own to the point where it can no longer be fixed.
I've learned from my educational experiences that stubborn women struggle in
their social and personal lives. The Bedouins of the Arabs usually teach their
daughters that if they make their husband their lord, he will make them his
queen.
This
implies that if you treat him as your master and turn into a slave for him, he
will treat you as his queen and turn into a slave as well. Once it does, she
can then use it to gain whatever she wants. These tips have been well-followed
by successful wives. Men are kind, welcoming, and very polite, yet obstinate
women turn them into adversaries. Families disintegrate as a result, divorce
rates rise, and widowhood rates rise in our culture.
There
are numerous factors that contribute to marital conflicts that result in
divorce. The wife's stubbornness and resistance to her husband stand out among
these. She tries to be like her husband in everything. sometimes, because of
her stubbornness, she starts to degrade him and thinks she is the only one who
can have a better opinion.
She
typically changes into a plaything in households when there has been a major
argument and violence between the husband and wife. The woman then exhibits
more resistance and puts her selfish attitude on display. The husband then
makes an attempt to break his wife's nose in retaliation for her attitude. We
need to be mindful that two powerful brains can hurt one another when they
collide. Similarly, when two people with strong temperaments argue, one of them
will undoubtedly crumble.
We
urge every wife to regain her femininity, tenderness, and submission to her
husband. In a similar fashion, we exhort every Pharaonic husband with a
tyrannical nature, a hard temper, and a hard heart to use his manhood wisely
and forbearingly, resisting the temptation to act like a Pharaoh just because
he is the one paying the maintenance and say "I will only show you what I
see".
In
the next essay, we will look at the rise of the divorce trend, in which males
are mainly accountable, in an effort to stop it and create a society that
upholds the principles and standards of our religion.
-----
Kaniz Fatma is a classic Islamic scholar and a
regular columnist for New Age Islam.
URL:
https://newageislam.com/islamic-q-a/divorce-rates-primarily-fault-women/d/130734
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