Accept People As They Are - This Is The Kernel Of Happiness And The Essence Of Human Existence
By
Sumit Paul, New Age Islam
27 March
2023
"Jo Dikhta Hai Woh Aksar Sach Nahin Hota
Aur Jo Sach Hota Hai Woh Aksar Nahin Dikhta" (What we see is not always true and what's
true is often not visible and obvious)
Akhtar Orenvi (1911-1977)
" When you call someone shallow, it's your
shallowness that surfaces."
A Turkish maxim
I read this
heart-touching and true anecdote in Anthony de Mello's immensely readable but
out of print book, "The Prayer of the Frog."
Gessen was
a Buddhist monk. He was also an exceptionally talented artist. Before he
started work on any painting, however, he always demanded payment in advance.
And his fees were exorbitant. So he came to be known as the Greedy Monk.
A geisha
once sent for him to have a painting done. Gessen said, "How much will you
pay me?" The girl happened to be entertaining a patron at that time. She
said, " Any sum you ask for. But the painting must be done right now
before me." Gessen set to work at once and when the painting was
completed, he asked for the highest sum he had ever charged. As the geisha was
giving him his money, she said to her patron, "This man is supposed to be
a monk but all he thinks of is money. His talent is exceptional but he has a
filthy, money-loving mind. How does one exhibit the canvas of a filthy-minded
man like that? His work is good enough for my underclothing!" With that
she flung a petticoat at him and asked him to paint a picture on it. Gessen
asked the usual question before he started the work: "How much will you
give me?" Oh, any sum you ask for," said the girl. Gessen named his
price, painted the picture, shamelessly pocketed the money and walked away.
Many years
later, quite by chance, someone found out why Gessen was so greedy for money. A
devastating famine often struck his home province. The rich would do nothing to
help the poor. So Gessen had secret barns built in the area and had them filled
with grain for such emergencies. No one knew where the grain came from or who
the benefactor of the province was.
Another
reason why Gessen wanted money was the road leading to his village from the
city many miles away. It was in such bad condition that ox-carts couldn't move
on it; this caused much suffering to the aged and the infirm when they needed
to get to the city. So Gessen had the road repaired.
The final
reason was a meditation temple which Gessen's teacher had always desired to
build but could not. Gessen built this temple as a token of gratitude to his
revered teacher. After the Greedy Monk had built the road, the temple and the
barns, he threw away his paint and brushes, retired to the mountains to give
himself to the contemplative life and never painted another canvas again.
A person's conduct generally shows what the
observer imagines it to show. Salman Rushdie said, " To know a person, one
has to swallow the whole world." We are all too quick to form an opinion
about others and we often err.
World is
our extension. When we call someone ugly, it's the ugliness of our personality
that manifests itself. And when we call someone good, it's the inherent
goodness in us that makes its presence felt. Nothing is good or bad, our
thinking makes it so. A person's motives and intentions can never be felt or
empathised by others on an even keel.
There's a
trenchantly beautiful Japanese saying, "Even a mother cannot feel the pain
of the child she has given birth to." So very true. When a mother, in
spite of her umbilical attachment to her child, cannot fully understand what
ails her baby, how can we sniff as to what's going on in someone's mind and
opine in haste?
Furthermore,
if we keep judging people, when will we get time to love them? So, stop judging
people. Accept them as they are. This is the crux of life, gist of
relationships, kernel of happiness and the very essence of human
existence.
------
A
regular columnist for New Age Islam, Sumit Paul is a researcher in comparative
religions, with special reference to Islam. He has contributed articles to the
world's premier publications in several languages including Persian.
URL: https://newageislam.com/spiritual-meditations/kernel-happiness-essence-human-existence/d/129411
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